INFINESSE BALI

The Art of Dealing with People by Les Giblin

A short read. This booklet reminds one of the criticality of not damaging the ego of another person in general interactions. Excellent advice - Dale Carnegie-like - and difficult to apply in practice - because it goes against our naturally selfish tendancies. Here is the basic structure of the book. (Please excuse the formatting - I was too lazy to find out how to make readable html survive the processing of blogger - which wants to interpret newlines and html tags with equal alacrity).

Thinking creatively about human relations
If you want to get anything done - you had better be
able to get along with other people
Understanding the human ego
Recognizing that everyone is egotistical, selfishly
interested in themselves, wants to amount to something
and wants to be feel approval
A starved ego is a mean ego
Making people feel important
Think others are important
Notice people
Don't compete with people
Know when to correct people
Controlling the actions and attitudes of others
Be confident
Walk confidently
Shake hands confidently
Moderate your voice
Smile
Impute virtue in others
Creating a good impression
Don't wear a disguise
Don't knock the competition
Developing an attractive personality
Accept, approve and appreciate others
Learning to communicate effectively
Don't try to be perfect
Get people talking about themselves
Don't tease and don't be sarcastic
Listening
Listening makes you clever, so...
Look at the person who is talking
Appear deeply interested
Lean towards the person
Ask questions
Don't interrupt, ask for more
Stick to the speaker's subject
User the speaker's words
Convincing others
Allow others to speak to state their case
Pause before you answer
Don't insist on winning 100%
State you case moderately
Speak through third parties
Allow others to save face
'I felt the same way about it at first, until I
ran acorss this information which changed the picture'
Giving praise
Sincerity
Speak up
Thank people by name
Look at people when you thank them
Work at thanking people
Thank people when they least expect it
Criticizing without offending
Criticize in private
Preface criticism with a kind word
Criticize the act not the person
Supply the answer
Ask for cooperation
One criticism to an offence
Finish in a friendly fashion